The Government Didn’t Shutdown But We’re Still Fucked


Image Via Policymic

So here’s what’s going on: President Obama tried to enact a bill (Obamacare) that would give everyone in the country access to affordable healthcare–y’know, like every other first-world country in the world. The Republican party didn’t like it. But that’s alright, people, like, have opinions, dude. What’s NOT alright is how they reacted–by doing everything in their power to sabotage this nation, by taking the government hostage, and by literally shutting it down completely for 16 days.

What does a 16-day shut down mean? Well, for starters, it took about $24 billion out of the economy. It hurt our already shaky reputation across the world. It put thousands of government workers out of a job.

Despite all this, last night, 144 Republicans voted to continue this dangerous nonsense.

Thankfully, President Obama and 198 Democrats (all of them), were able to push through the bill that prevented the shut down by raising the debt ceiling. Federal workers who had been furloughed are scheduled to return to “work” today. National parks are opening back up. NASA is slowly waking up from it’s 16-day nap… but seriously, guys? The deadline was midnight–the bill was signed just minutes beforehand.

The GOP is made up of shitty children. They’re the spoiled kid in the supermarket that wails and flails on the floor because their exhausted mother wouldn’t add a fifth 24-pack of Oreos to the cart.

And here’s the kicker–nothing was actually solved. All they did was just buy themselves a few months. This same exact thing is going to happen again, except the new deadline is February 7th. All this bullshit will be rehashed and all the news organizations will have a field day and all the Democrats will tear their hair out and all the Republicans will throw stupid tantrums and we’ll all watch and tweet SMFH. This will probably go on forever. Or at least until we wise up as a nation and stop voting Republican!

If you plan on styling regardless of how badly our government is wyling out, these are for you.




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